It's the news you all have been waiting for. Unless something unforeseen occurs in the next day or so, Thane and I will spend Christmas in our new home.
It is in the same vicinity as the previous one we visited in the down pouring conditions, but it is a much better situation for me/ us.
I had to make some compromises; realizing that with the time limits, cap on what an apartment could cost, and limited accessibility in our area in standard built apartments, if I was ever going to find a place, it would need to be with compromises.
The hardest compromise made is that Thane has lost his yard. I have wrestled with this more the last couple of days than I initially thought I would. Though this puts a wrinkle in dealing with his busy needs, the part about it that is the hardest for me is losing the ability to play off lead in the snow from our back door.
This morning when we woke up, we were treated with a dusting of snow and snow still coming down. After busy, Thane immediately looked for his football (which had already been packed). I ran and found another suitable toy that was in an open box still and we just cut loose. I did not care if he wound up needing a bath. We needed this *send off*.
With that aside, let me tell you how great our new place will be once we get our life sorted out there. It has indoor locked mailboxes. There will be no more running for mail in my unsecured mailbox in pouring rain or being forced to go for the mail when I am sick or toxic things are going on. A little stroll down the hall and mail can be retrieved vbg
We lose a bedroom, but we gain our own washer and dryer and the opportunity to train a new task for Thane. I wonder how he will be at unloading a dryer. He's never even been around one since he came into my life. I'm excited about that new opportunity.
We will be playing games in the bath tub at the new place to acclimate Thane to a tub. Losing the roll in shower will be difficult, but in the end, I think it will work out alright and besides it is always fun to run after treats no matter where they land!
The best parts I have saved for the end. We will be just a couple stops from the nature trail we love to frequent and a few stops from New Seasons where most of my grocery shopping is done. I can't even wrap my head around that quick ride. The most awesome thing of all probably for an individual with MCS is that this complex is smoke free- not just the indoors, but the entire grounds.
There was a time when I felt this was never going to come to a close, but once the right place was there for us, things began moving really fast.
On the downside, I am in constant pain from the extreme level of overuse I have had to endure lately. I/ we just need this to be over! We need our life back so whoever stole ours, would you kindly return it!
Our next post will most likely be from our new haunts where we will be spending Christmas this year. I can see a trip to the trail in view as long as it is not raining, but then- this is the pacific northwest Totally unpredictable!
18 December 2012
04 December 2012
Apartment Hunting in the Rain
GADS I hate rain but most of all I hate being drenched to the skin when trying to see apartments.
Thane and I took on our first attempt to view the apartment complex of my dreams- or so I thought it was. I gave us plenty of time cuz frankly I knew I'd get turned around. I always do that when it comes to directions and new locations, but somehow if I give myself time and ask for help, I usually succeed.
Today was no different- except that we were turned around in a deluge of elephants and rhinoceroses LOL
Thane's work was pretty amazing for the most part today which impressed me with all that has been going on. He needs a bit of work in slowing down his gait in the rain, but that is my fault from how I have worked him in the rain trying to lickety split to get where we can go inside. I need to work with him a bit on that.
Once we were turned back around, I found we were still early. That gave me some time to dry off the muddy paws, legs, underbelly- what didn't need cleaning up before trapsing into the office (huge place) and the apartments we were going to see.
I really liked the lady, but the business office was quite toxic something I'll be paying for (amidst the bus drivers perm and hairspray that left me flushing water, milk thistle, and washing my coat when outdoors couldn't cut it)
The apartments were located in such a perfect area- close to the max. I guess they were about as far from the max as I am from the closest bus stop right now (if that). Their location is also very central for quick ease of all sorts of shopping needs for me- the biggest being their proximity to New Seasons.
There were some things I didn't like from the start. The apartments require you to go inside a hallway of apartments. This is done via an outer closed door and there is no discernible pavement deviation like the cracks I use to determine where we are (or I am when I'm solo). These types of door situations are difficult for me. I swear I need to be an octopus! I may have been able to accept that and work with it, but it would have been quite difficult when coming home with groceries if there were not people around to ask for help.
Once inside, I realized how spacious my apartment really is. It was quite small and quite obviously built for the able bodied population and those who do not have many belongings. The washer and Dryers were great. They even had a built in complete apartment de-humidifier in all the ground floor units for the humidity aspects of having the washers. The area was quite confined though which would be a bit difficult. The layout in one had the two separated, but not by the kind of distance I thought so it would have been manageable (though I did not like it off the kitchen)
The show stoppers were the walk in closet where I could not get beyond the door (but came close) which meant I could not get to the rack where I'd hang my clothes. Theoretically removing the door probably would have solved that.
The bathroom though was the definitive show stopper. It was designed like the letter L shape for passageway putting the bathtub in the back corner. There was only room for a head on transfer- with both the toilet and bath tub- something I can not do. Being blind with tremor issues in my hands, I also do not back out of narrow places well. Though I managed to do it in both the bath rooms (two different size units), it was pretty obvious to me, that the situation was not a safe one. I think I'd be on a first name basis with the fire men at the local department if I took these apartments.
From there, I learned that there is no direct apartment access to busy a dog or even anywhere for them to play like I am able to do here. I realized there would be things I would have to give up to get a safe home again with the section 8 price caps, but this is not one of those things I can rationalize losing. Between weather, my health, safety after dark, and oh yeah that fun disorder of gluten intolerance that could have Thane in explosive diarrhea- nope I need to be able to potty him at our apartment.
There were so many pluses too about the place- full sized washer and dryers that are energy conserving, carpet was in good shape and not fragrant through my mask (business office was that way), no new painting, the dining area was slightly separated from living room so that my sewing and dresser I use for medical supplies could easily have been set up there.
The biggest asset of this place though was its location.
When I tally up everything and ask myself how I would manage to live the independent life I now do with that bathroom and the busy restrictions for Thane (and not being able to play in the snow when we get it), I had to realize that this complex, as ideally placed as it is, is not the future new home we are looking for.
This has really been a difficult decision, but honestly I knew the instant I entered the bathroom that it was over- that this was not to be our home.
We came home, got Thane a good rinse down from all the mud and wet he dealt with today, got my drenched multiple layered clothes off (drenched to the skin) and warmed us both up.
Tomorrow is another day to hunt for apartments again
but really, I need some gf chocolate chip cookies before we do any more serious romping like we did today!
Thane and I took on our first attempt to view the apartment complex of my dreams- or so I thought it was. I gave us plenty of time cuz frankly I knew I'd get turned around. I always do that when it comes to directions and new locations, but somehow if I give myself time and ask for help, I usually succeed.
Today was no different- except that we were turned around in a deluge of elephants and rhinoceroses LOL
Thane's work was pretty amazing for the most part today which impressed me with all that has been going on. He needs a bit of work in slowing down his gait in the rain, but that is my fault from how I have worked him in the rain trying to lickety split to get where we can go inside. I need to work with him a bit on that.
Once we were turned back around, I found we were still early. That gave me some time to dry off the muddy paws, legs, underbelly- what didn't need cleaning up before trapsing into the office (huge place) and the apartments we were going to see.
I really liked the lady, but the business office was quite toxic something I'll be paying for (amidst the bus drivers perm and hairspray that left me flushing water, milk thistle, and washing my coat when outdoors couldn't cut it)
The apartments were located in such a perfect area- close to the max. I guess they were about as far from the max as I am from the closest bus stop right now (if that). Their location is also very central for quick ease of all sorts of shopping needs for me- the biggest being their proximity to New Seasons.
There were some things I didn't like from the start. The apartments require you to go inside a hallway of apartments. This is done via an outer closed door and there is no discernible pavement deviation like the cracks I use to determine where we are (or I am when I'm solo). These types of door situations are difficult for me. I swear I need to be an octopus! I may have been able to accept that and work with it, but it would have been quite difficult when coming home with groceries if there were not people around to ask for help.
Once inside, I realized how spacious my apartment really is. It was quite small and quite obviously built for the able bodied population and those who do not have many belongings. The washer and Dryers were great. They even had a built in complete apartment de-humidifier in all the ground floor units for the humidity aspects of having the washers. The area was quite confined though which would be a bit difficult. The layout in one had the two separated, but not by the kind of distance I thought so it would have been manageable (though I did not like it off the kitchen)
The show stoppers were the walk in closet where I could not get beyond the door (but came close) which meant I could not get to the rack where I'd hang my clothes. Theoretically removing the door probably would have solved that.
The bathroom though was the definitive show stopper. It was designed like the letter L shape for passageway putting the bathtub in the back corner. There was only room for a head on transfer- with both the toilet and bath tub- something I can not do. Being blind with tremor issues in my hands, I also do not back out of narrow places well. Though I managed to do it in both the bath rooms (two different size units), it was pretty obvious to me, that the situation was not a safe one. I think I'd be on a first name basis with the fire men at the local department if I took these apartments.
From there, I learned that there is no direct apartment access to busy a dog or even anywhere for them to play like I am able to do here. I realized there would be things I would have to give up to get a safe home again with the section 8 price caps, but this is not one of those things I can rationalize losing. Between weather, my health, safety after dark, and oh yeah that fun disorder of gluten intolerance that could have Thane in explosive diarrhea- nope I need to be able to potty him at our apartment.
There were so many pluses too about the place- full sized washer and dryers that are energy conserving, carpet was in good shape and not fragrant through my mask (business office was that way), no new painting, the dining area was slightly separated from living room so that my sewing and dresser I use for medical supplies could easily have been set up there.
The biggest asset of this place though was its location.
When I tally up everything and ask myself how I would manage to live the independent life I now do with that bathroom and the busy restrictions for Thane (and not being able to play in the snow when we get it), I had to realize that this complex, as ideally placed as it is, is not the future new home we are looking for.
This has really been a difficult decision, but honestly I knew the instant I entered the bathroom that it was over- that this was not to be our home.
We came home, got Thane a good rinse down from all the mud and wet he dealt with today, got my drenched multiple layered clothes off (drenched to the skin) and warmed us both up.
Tomorrow is another day to hunt for apartments again
but really, I need some gf chocolate chip cookies before we do any more serious romping like we did today!
Thank you Chimette
Today you would have been 16 years old. I find myself thinking about the silly quirks you had today. I dunno why- perhaps because they were funny. Like how you loved to roo roo roo when I was playing with you what a ham
Today I am grateful for the lessons taught but also for the fact that your suffering is no longer. There will always be moments of missing you- afterall you were the one who showed me that I actually could train my own service dog.
You were a great first dog for me to have to work with and train but on those days when I am struggling in my work with Thane, people remind me of just how many days like that were in our partnership too- funny how I don't remember those! vbg
There are lots of things I could thank you for today, but I guess the one I appreciate the most is how you let me see through you and kept me safe until I was really ready for the world on my own.
Today I am grateful for the lessons taught but also for the fact that your suffering is no longer. There will always be moments of missing you- afterall you were the one who showed me that I actually could train my own service dog.
You were a great first dog for me to have to work with and train but on those days when I am struggling in my work with Thane, people remind me of just how many days like that were in our partnership too- funny how I don't remember those! vbg
There are lots of things I could thank you for today, but I guess the one I appreciate the most is how you let me see through you and kept me safe until I was really ready for the world on my own.
02 December 2012
Chicken Little, the Sky is Falling!
That is exactly what I have felt like over the last nearly three weeks. You might wonder where we have been. Well... my life and Thane's literally turned upside down almost three weeks ago when my manager showed up at my door with a massive renovation schedule. Forget the notice that this was even taking place or the fact that it is the rainy season in the Pacific Northwest and inconducive for spending any amount of time outdoors or with windows open to air a place out- oh yeah and forget the fact that I have PROFOUND MCS!
Here I was though with my life in the balance LITERALLY. There was no way around it, it was time for a move and so began all the frantic work between me, ILR, caseworkers, my folks, Community Action, a few very caring friends, and I am sure I am leaving someone out.
Living on Section 8 allows me to move which is a huge plus (something HUD complex subsidy never would have enabled me to do) On the other hand, it can be very restrictive. Lets face it Section 8 limits don't take into account the real reality out there.
When you add MCS to the mix in trying to find a new place- oh boy, it makes life interesting. Apartments are not generally advertised until AFTER they have already been painted, re-carpeted, and cleaned with heavy chemical cleaners. I keep telling my folks that what we need is a list of the units *to be available soon*
Needless to say my holidays (Thanksgiving and Christmas) have been/ will be spent frantically packing/ unpacking hopefully. If trying to prepare for a move spur of the moment isn't difficult enough, try doing it when even the boxes you use to pack have to be MCS safe and they are in limited supply because you had no idea you needed to be keeping every Wag.com and Amazon box that hit your porch over the past year!
My apartment has rapidly been worked into box after box so that when a place is available, I will be ready to just seal up the last minute boxes and boxes of clothing that I am living out of as though they were suitcases.
You might wonder what happens to Thane in all this hubbub going on. I won't say it has been easy on him, but he is really taking it in stride. Sometimes he seems sad or a bit bewildered by the happenings. After all we have lived here the entire time I have had him. He does not know what this scale of moving is. I'm taking the time for those moments of training and fun. Sometimes that just means throwing his dinner for him to fetch while others it means filling buster cube so he can dispense it around the room himself.
I've been concerned obviously about what this level of stress on me, could do to him. At present, I've actually found him more in tune to me and the alerts we have trained or were training. I absolutely love it when he bounces up to me in full *paws* mode (front feet in my lap, on my armrest, on back of chair) to tell me someone is at the door or my timer went off (wherever I sat the thing down at). Moments like these are a joy.
Life will one day be normal again, but for right now, I struggle with getting everything done amidst the toxicity that I know could easily take my life. Today though, it is not. Today I am here with Thane and we will be OK in a new home one day very soon.
The leads have been few on the *new home* front. Either they don't take Section 8 or the price in their advertisement, isn't really the price they plan on charging and thus it is over my cap for Section 8. I'm also having to downsize to a one bedroom which is not good for MCS. Having a spare room for detox needs is crucial for me. I didn't have this in the apartment in California and I paid pretty heavily for that. I have the ability however to layout my living area how I see fit and appropriate for my needs since I will be entering this post MCS when I can control my personal space.
We've got our eyes on a place now. All I can do is take a look and if it seems good for my needs, hope that it will be able to be fit into the cap that Section 8 has for me. The overall expense there will be higher, but there are a number of perks that would make my life with MCS so much easier.
Today though, I have to be patient. The lady who helped my folks see the place is away until Tuesday. These days are for errands and more packing (while hoping other staff memebers don't rent the units out from under us), and oh yeah, a time to get out and work this redhead of mine so he feels like a new dog again.
One day I am sure I will look back on all this chaos and nightmare that has unfolded and have a funny tale to tell, but today, I just want it to be over.
Here I was though with my life in the balance LITERALLY. There was no way around it, it was time for a move and so began all the frantic work between me, ILR, caseworkers, my folks, Community Action, a few very caring friends, and I am sure I am leaving someone out.
Living on Section 8 allows me to move which is a huge plus (something HUD complex subsidy never would have enabled me to do) On the other hand, it can be very restrictive. Lets face it Section 8 limits don't take into account the real reality out there.
When you add MCS to the mix in trying to find a new place- oh boy, it makes life interesting. Apartments are not generally advertised until AFTER they have already been painted, re-carpeted, and cleaned with heavy chemical cleaners. I keep telling my folks that what we need is a list of the units *to be available soon*
Needless to say my holidays (Thanksgiving and Christmas) have been/ will be spent frantically packing/ unpacking hopefully. If trying to prepare for a move spur of the moment isn't difficult enough, try doing it when even the boxes you use to pack have to be MCS safe and they are in limited supply because you had no idea you needed to be keeping every Wag.com and Amazon box that hit your porch over the past year!
My apartment has rapidly been worked into box after box so that when a place is available, I will be ready to just seal up the last minute boxes and boxes of clothing that I am living out of as though they were suitcases.
You might wonder what happens to Thane in all this hubbub going on. I won't say it has been easy on him, but he is really taking it in stride. Sometimes he seems sad or a bit bewildered by the happenings. After all we have lived here the entire time I have had him. He does not know what this scale of moving is. I'm taking the time for those moments of training and fun. Sometimes that just means throwing his dinner for him to fetch while others it means filling buster cube so he can dispense it around the room himself.
I've been concerned obviously about what this level of stress on me, could do to him. At present, I've actually found him more in tune to me and the alerts we have trained or were training. I absolutely love it when he bounces up to me in full *paws* mode (front feet in my lap, on my armrest, on back of chair) to tell me someone is at the door or my timer went off (wherever I sat the thing down at). Moments like these are a joy.
Life will one day be normal again, but for right now, I struggle with getting everything done amidst the toxicity that I know could easily take my life. Today though, it is not. Today I am here with Thane and we will be OK in a new home one day very soon.
The leads have been few on the *new home* front. Either they don't take Section 8 or the price in their advertisement, isn't really the price they plan on charging and thus it is over my cap for Section 8. I'm also having to downsize to a one bedroom which is not good for MCS. Having a spare room for detox needs is crucial for me. I didn't have this in the apartment in California and I paid pretty heavily for that. I have the ability however to layout my living area how I see fit and appropriate for my needs since I will be entering this post MCS when I can control my personal space.
We've got our eyes on a place now. All I can do is take a look and if it seems good for my needs, hope that it will be able to be fit into the cap that Section 8 has for me. The overall expense there will be higher, but there are a number of perks that would make my life with MCS so much easier.
Today though, I have to be patient. The lady who helped my folks see the place is away until Tuesday. These days are for errands and more packing (while hoping other staff memebers don't rent the units out from under us), and oh yeah, a time to get out and work this redhead of mine so he feels like a new dog again.
One day I am sure I will look back on all this chaos and nightmare that has unfolded and have a funny tale to tell, but today, I just want it to be over.
13 November 2012
A Special Day
Who knows what today is?
I'll give you a hint...
A 9 month old Border Collie
You Give Up?
OK, I'll tell you all. Today is the five year anniversary of when this red and white pup came into my life. It was just a little over two months since I lost Met. My life had been shattered literally, but the entrance of Thane signified hope for the future.
He had a very big day- this country Border Collie. His flight required two plane trips and landed in Portland at night. Heck, I was normally getting settled for shows and bed when we took off from here for the airport.
One of the first things I realized was just how much I had taught Met. I couldn't believe it. It'd been so long since I had a dog that didn't know how to walk beside my chair on a leash. It was mind-boggling. It was scary. There was even some wonderment if I had bitten off more than I could chew- could I really do this again with as much as my disabilities had progressed over the past decade.
Thane was to be a challenge for sure. He had a doggie door before- none here. He had the ability to pee and poop where he wanted- not here He did not like this stupid new owner who was insisting he was going to busy on the leash- yup in the pouring down rain, no less. Oh did we battle over this one- I know how NOT to approach that next time around! vbg
There were times- many of them, when I felt the likelihood for this to become a successful partnership was slim at best- and yet we managed to triumph over the obstacles that brought that dreaded R word to mind. I figured at this point, after our victory, there was nothing that could hold us back
How wrong could I have been!
Thane had unexplained symptoms- dulled and slowed responses, wandering lameness, falling off edges of sidewalks as though he had peripheral deficits, seizures, bruising and bleeding issues, and the symptoms kept mounting until he collapsed. They were bizarre, scary and the vet NEVER used any of her training to help me decipher what could be happening. It was up to me to research and suggest what to test him for. Thanks to Sharon at After Gadget blog, who knows tick borne diseases better than she would like I am sure, I got a diagnosis for Thane before it was too late.
It was to be a long journey back- a journey being fought amidst undiagnosed hypothyroidism (because noone would listen to me) We made it back from Lyme, but the setbacks from hypo (which included months without my sidekick in public) and severe gluten intolerance (caused by mishandling his hypo) were difficult and are newly being addressed.
Today when I look back at the last five years, I have to admit, this is not the journey I envisioned when I welcomed this healthy redhead into my life. I realize though, that just like Met taught me about vaccinosis and how not to address hypothyroidism, Thane taught me about Lyme Disease- how it is everywhere despite what his previous vet keeps telling people. Thane is also teaching me about other modes of treatment in hypothyroidism- about treating the individual instead of the labs, and about Gluten Intolerance, a disorder I knew nothing about this past June, yet now am living the benefits alongside Thane of a gluten free life. Above all though, he has taught me about a dog's love for his deafblind handler- experiencing him saving my life time and again will never become something I take forgranted. When will people just drive already and forget about their phone, radio, makeup, how late they are- snicker
There've been days when this journey has been so much like Mets was that I just want to flee- start all over and recognize that dark bump on his abdomen as a tick- get him help then. I can't do that though. Instead I will take these lessons that were Thane's to teach and be grateful that I can use this knowledge to help others avoid our heartbreaks.
Sometimes I wonder why both my dogs wound up with long term and/ or chronic conditions like they did. I struggle with it from time to time, but in the end I realize that this is a partnership- one of teaching and working together as a team. These were their lessons to impart.
It wouldn't be much of a partnership, if I were the only one doing the teaching now would it?
At the end of the day, it may seem like this partnership has been filled with more sorrow than triumph, but I don't look at it that way. Because of Thane, I have grown as a trainer (trying to determine the best way to teach what seemed unteachable with him). I've advanced in my mobility skills thanks to Lyme and I've learned how to truly trust a guide unconditionally in traffic emergencies.
This redhead and me, well, we were just meant to be together
I'll give you a hint...
A 9 month old Border Collie
You Give Up?
OK, I'll tell you all. Today is the five year anniversary of when this red and white pup came into my life. It was just a little over two months since I lost Met. My life had been shattered literally, but the entrance of Thane signified hope for the future.
He had a very big day- this country Border Collie. His flight required two plane trips and landed in Portland at night. Heck, I was normally getting settled for shows and bed when we took off from here for the airport.
One of the first things I realized was just how much I had taught Met. I couldn't believe it. It'd been so long since I had a dog that didn't know how to walk beside my chair on a leash. It was mind-boggling. It was scary. There was even some wonderment if I had bitten off more than I could chew- could I really do this again with as much as my disabilities had progressed over the past decade.
Thane was to be a challenge for sure. He had a doggie door before- none here. He had the ability to pee and poop where he wanted- not here He did not like this stupid new owner who was insisting he was going to busy on the leash- yup in the pouring down rain, no less. Oh did we battle over this one- I know how NOT to approach that next time around! vbg
There were times- many of them, when I felt the likelihood for this to become a successful partnership was slim at best- and yet we managed to triumph over the obstacles that brought that dreaded R word to mind. I figured at this point, after our victory, there was nothing that could hold us back
How wrong could I have been!
Thane had unexplained symptoms- dulled and slowed responses, wandering lameness, falling off edges of sidewalks as though he had peripheral deficits, seizures, bruising and bleeding issues, and the symptoms kept mounting until he collapsed. They were bizarre, scary and the vet NEVER used any of her training to help me decipher what could be happening. It was up to me to research and suggest what to test him for. Thanks to Sharon at After Gadget blog, who knows tick borne diseases better than she would like I am sure, I got a diagnosis for Thane before it was too late.
It was to be a long journey back- a journey being fought amidst undiagnosed hypothyroidism (because noone would listen to me) We made it back from Lyme, but the setbacks from hypo (which included months without my sidekick in public) and severe gluten intolerance (caused by mishandling his hypo) were difficult and are newly being addressed.
Today when I look back at the last five years, I have to admit, this is not the journey I envisioned when I welcomed this healthy redhead into my life. I realize though, that just like Met taught me about vaccinosis and how not to address hypothyroidism, Thane taught me about Lyme Disease- how it is everywhere despite what his previous vet keeps telling people. Thane is also teaching me about other modes of treatment in hypothyroidism- about treating the individual instead of the labs, and about Gluten Intolerance, a disorder I knew nothing about this past June, yet now am living the benefits alongside Thane of a gluten free life. Above all though, he has taught me about a dog's love for his deafblind handler- experiencing him saving my life time and again will never become something I take forgranted. When will people just drive already and forget about their phone, radio, makeup, how late they are- snicker
There've been days when this journey has been so much like Mets was that I just want to flee- start all over and recognize that dark bump on his abdomen as a tick- get him help then. I can't do that though. Instead I will take these lessons that were Thane's to teach and be grateful that I can use this knowledge to help others avoid our heartbreaks.
Sometimes I wonder why both my dogs wound up with long term and/ or chronic conditions like they did. I struggle with it from time to time, but in the end I realize that this is a partnership- one of teaching and working together as a team. These were their lessons to impart.
It wouldn't be much of a partnership, if I were the only one doing the teaching now would it?
At the end of the day, it may seem like this partnership has been filled with more sorrow than triumph, but I don't look at it that way. Because of Thane, I have grown as a trainer (trying to determine the best way to teach what seemed unteachable with him). I've advanced in my mobility skills thanks to Lyme and I've learned how to truly trust a guide unconditionally in traffic emergencies.
This redhead and me, well, we were just meant to be together
20 October 2012
Saving a Life or Two
This post is for the Assistance Dog Blog Carnival being hosted by Martha at the blog Believe in Who You Are The topic for this carnival is *Moments*
There are so many aspects to Assistance Dog partnership that have their memorable moments- even more so for those of us who are owner trainers. As an individual with progressive deafblindness, incomplete quadriplegia, and other substantial medical hurdles, the first moments that come to mind are two life saving events- one by each of my combo trained guide, hearing, service dogs. Initially, I was only going to write about the event with my present partnership; however, I realized that both of these events have played a crucial role in shaping who I am as a trainer and handler.
It was around 2004. I was taking Chimette (AKA Met) for our normal routine short walk while my apartment was being vacuumed. Met was a typical male who loved to mark when I allowed him to, and sometimes tried to do so of his own accord with failing results. As males go, his marking behavior was honestly not that bad though he had a favorite area where he really loved to mark as we turned toward home.
Our path had no big obstacles to deal with that morning- everything was flowing with a calm, peaceful simplicity until Met jerked over under the trees alongside the sidewalk path. Something told me that despite our location, this action was not about marking so I followed his lead moving my chair over under the trees just as a white streak passed so close I could have reached out and touched it. The driver, so out of control, that he or she jumped the curb at the corner using the sidewalk as an extension of the road. I knew the police were not far behind after Met's siren alert so we stayed put.
Met got a jackpot of praise and opportunity to mark, and as Julie Johnson puts it, check all the pee mail he could ever want to check. During that interval I worked on getting my heart to stop pounding so hard that I could feel it in my chest. The realization of just what Met had done for me in that moment remains as clear in my mind some eight years later as it did the moment it occurred. He was indeed my hero who quite literally saved our lives that day.
Life goes on though and one doesn't think every day about each moment of excitement, wonder, or even life saving events. Met aged, passed away, and his successor stepped up to the plate in grand fashion. During this time, my disabilities had all progressed substantially. Still, I didn't think too much about all the moments each day- all the times Thane proved himself as we trained or worked as a green team.
There were so many times when drivers needed a refresher course about yielding for pedestrians, about looking for pedestrians when entering the crosswalk with their vehicles, and oh boy- the stories I could tell about the life saving moments caused by individuals who plain and simply need to have the keys taken away from them.
The one moment though in this partnership with Thane, that really stays in my mind and probably will for all time occurred May 20, 2011 shortly before Thane would collapse from undiagnosed Lyme disease. I included this fact, solely because it makes what he did this day all that much more of a memorable moment forever etched in my mind.
It was a beautiful day and we were going to take advantage of it. Living in the Pacific Northwest, we were coming off of our nine to ten months of annual rain and everyone was ready for the kind of weather we had that day. We headed to the trail and then back to New Seasons for a few items. As we were crossing the street with the signal (why are we always in the middle or three quarters of the way across the street when people try and put their 2000 pound or more vehicles to the test against pedestrians- deafblind ones at that), Thane slammed himself across my path at which point I immediately backed my chair some, but not before the unfortunate aspect of wheeling over a paw. With Thane's focus on getting me back, I doubt there was even a whimper at that unfortunate impact we made. I felt the swoosh of the air as a car ripped past us, not even slowing down at our presence. The signal there (and all along that street and too many others) has a yield arrow where cars can turn left when it is clear. The problem being is that they RARELY look for pedestrians.
Once we made it across the street and steadied our nerves, I gave Thane jackpot praise for what I realized immediately was the closest I had ever come to being severely injured or killed since partnered with a guide dog. This event had a greater impact than the one with his predecessor, Met, but each leaving me with gratefulness for the results of hard training and partnership with the dog at my side. I swapped handles (the glue had popped in the forceful re-direction Thane had to make) and we carried on. I've learned many times over how valuable it can be to carry a spare guide handle with us.
As we walked along towards the max station, I noticed Thane's pull in harness was different, but didn't think too much about it since his gait seemed normal. When we got to the max station is when I realized just the extent of what he had done for me. His forceful blocking of my chair had caused a sheering of his skin from the harness straps and forced torque of the guide handle.
My skin didn't fare much better than Thane's did. As we spent some days at home to heal, I tried not to let myself feel as awful as I did about Thane being injured in the performance of his duty. Instead I focused on the fact that we were still there, still together, because he performed his duty to the utmost of his ability.
I've heard a number of heartbreaking stories over the years about service dogs killed while crossing streets or parking lots, many of which were guide dogs. I continue to be grateful for the fast action of Thane that day. I am sure that his training, the repetitive need to use this skill due to distracted or incompetent drivers, our bond that helped me realize his urgency in that split second, and especially his agile build helped keep us safe that day.
That was the day when I realized above and beyond, that Thane was the right dog to have at my side.
There are so many aspects to Assistance Dog partnership that have their memorable moments- even more so for those of us who are owner trainers. As an individual with progressive deafblindness, incomplete quadriplegia, and other substantial medical hurdles, the first moments that come to mind are two life saving events- one by each of my combo trained guide, hearing, service dogs. Initially, I was only going to write about the event with my present partnership; however, I realized that both of these events have played a crucial role in shaping who I am as a trainer and handler.
It was around 2004. I was taking Chimette (AKA Met) for our normal routine short walk while my apartment was being vacuumed. Met was a typical male who loved to mark when I allowed him to, and sometimes tried to do so of his own accord with failing results. As males go, his marking behavior was honestly not that bad though he had a favorite area where he really loved to mark as we turned toward home.
Our path had no big obstacles to deal with that morning- everything was flowing with a calm, peaceful simplicity until Met jerked over under the trees alongside the sidewalk path. Something told me that despite our location, this action was not about marking so I followed his lead moving my chair over under the trees just as a white streak passed so close I could have reached out and touched it. The driver, so out of control, that he or she jumped the curb at the corner using the sidewalk as an extension of the road. I knew the police were not far behind after Met's siren alert so we stayed put.
Met got a jackpot of praise and opportunity to mark, and as Julie Johnson puts it, check all the pee mail he could ever want to check. During that interval I worked on getting my heart to stop pounding so hard that I could feel it in my chest. The realization of just what Met had done for me in that moment remains as clear in my mind some eight years later as it did the moment it occurred. He was indeed my hero who quite literally saved our lives that day.
Life goes on though and one doesn't think every day about each moment of excitement, wonder, or even life saving events. Met aged, passed away, and his successor stepped up to the plate in grand fashion. During this time, my disabilities had all progressed substantially. Still, I didn't think too much about all the moments each day- all the times Thane proved himself as we trained or worked as a green team.
There were so many times when drivers needed a refresher course about yielding for pedestrians, about looking for pedestrians when entering the crosswalk with their vehicles, and oh boy- the stories I could tell about the life saving moments caused by individuals who plain and simply need to have the keys taken away from them.
The one moment though in this partnership with Thane, that really stays in my mind and probably will for all time occurred May 20, 2011 shortly before Thane would collapse from undiagnosed Lyme disease. I included this fact, solely because it makes what he did this day all that much more of a memorable moment forever etched in my mind.
It was a beautiful day and we were going to take advantage of it. Living in the Pacific Northwest, we were coming off of our nine to ten months of annual rain and everyone was ready for the kind of weather we had that day. We headed to the trail and then back to New Seasons for a few items. As we were crossing the street with the signal (why are we always in the middle or three quarters of the way across the street when people try and put their 2000 pound or more vehicles to the test against pedestrians- deafblind ones at that), Thane slammed himself across my path at which point I immediately backed my chair some, but not before the unfortunate aspect of wheeling over a paw. With Thane's focus on getting me back, I doubt there was even a whimper at that unfortunate impact we made. I felt the swoosh of the air as a car ripped past us, not even slowing down at our presence. The signal there (and all along that street and too many others) has a yield arrow where cars can turn left when it is clear. The problem being is that they RARELY look for pedestrians.
Once we made it across the street and steadied our nerves, I gave Thane jackpot praise for what I realized immediately was the closest I had ever come to being severely injured or killed since partnered with a guide dog. This event had a greater impact than the one with his predecessor, Met, but each leaving me with gratefulness for the results of hard training and partnership with the dog at my side. I swapped handles (the glue had popped in the forceful re-direction Thane had to make) and we carried on. I've learned many times over how valuable it can be to carry a spare guide handle with us.
As we walked along towards the max station, I noticed Thane's pull in harness was different, but didn't think too much about it since his gait seemed normal. When we got to the max station is when I realized just the extent of what he had done for me. His forceful blocking of my chair had caused a sheering of his skin from the harness straps and forced torque of the guide handle.
My skin didn't fare much better than Thane's did. As we spent some days at home to heal, I tried not to let myself feel as awful as I did about Thane being injured in the performance of his duty. Instead I focused on the fact that we were still there, still together, because he performed his duty to the utmost of his ability.
I've heard a number of heartbreaking stories over the years about service dogs killed while crossing streets or parking lots, many of which were guide dogs. I continue to be grateful for the fast action of Thane that day. I am sure that his training, the repetitive need to use this skill due to distracted or incompetent drivers, our bond that helped me realize his urgency in that split second, and especially his agile build helped keep us safe that day.
That was the day when I realized above and beyond, that Thane was the right dog to have at my side.
10 September 2012
A Day of Remembrance for Chimette
 |
| Met Guides me in harness- early partnership |
The days that followed were unbelievable. I could not imagine how I would ever be able to function as a whole person again. Over the years, Met had adapted to my disabilities as much as I had to them by providing me with skills that I never would have considered needing when I first began training him. When he was gone, so was my strategy for functional living.
As hard as those first days and weeks felt in terms of my functional skills, my heart was turned to raw mincemeat. The loss went far deeper than just skills I lost. As an individual with MCS, I had no physical friends that I could visit with or do things with. My animals, but especially my service dog were my family, my firiends, my everything. I had lost my birds earlier that year and now I was literally alone for the first time since 1992.
Eventually I learned to pick up the pieces and adapt a bit- albeit awkwardly to my limitations. I knew I would eventually adopt another dog to train as my successor, but I could not imagine how I could bond with or work with another dog that was not Met.
It took a while, but I came to a place where I realized that Met would want this for me- Met would want me to be happy, to move on, to give another dog a chance to truly shine.
And that is what I did- little by little I let Thane worm his way into my heart, into my life, into the position that Met once held
But even as it is a special thing with Thane, there will never be those first exhilarations as I watched and experienced how much a service dog could become for me, could change my life and my outlook on life
Though moving on was the right thing to do, I take his journey and all its lessons with me. They are afterall a part of who I am today- why I am the way I am and most especially why Thane is alive and getting healthier each and every day.
 |
| Met lays on the grass in the sun on one of his last really good days |
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)